Can you decline to give a reason, and ask to not attempt to be retained when you resign?

Question

Update:

I ended up giving my two-weeks notice. My manager asked if there was anything they could do to keep me around or make things better for me at my current position, to which I very vaguely responded that there wouldn't be, and that it just wasn't a good fit for me. I ended up just telling my manager I'd be leaving over the phone, after sending him a message asking for a meeting (We live on opposite ends of country so couldn't talk in person), instead of writing out my notice on a document.

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If someone intended to resign a position at their current job, and did not want to give any specific reasons for leaving, would this be unprofessional?

It seems to me that it's 'expected' that you give some sort of reason / feedback for leaving.

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Quite frankly, I'd like to leave my current position. Management 'listens' to issues, but does not act to resolve them. So I feel that it would be a waste of my time to re-iterate a long list of things that have been communicated over time and more or less ignored as my reason(s) for leaving. Not to mention trying to pick 'one' specific reason or a few, when really it's just a culmination of things about this position - the company really, more than the position - that make me want to find opportunities elsewhere.

When the time comes, I'd like to know whether it's acceptable to say something along the lines of the following (Cleaned up a bit of course, but you get the idea):

"Hello,

I will be resigning from the position of [Current position] at [Current Company] on [Month and Day]/[Year].

I do not wish to give a specific reason for leaving. I do not wish to be retained, please do not submit a counter offer."

I just want things between me and this company to be more or less done. I'm sure they'll try, and try hard, to retain me and find a way to keep me here, as it's a small company and I've had major contributions to the team and several projects that I've been the only one to work on.

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Regardless, I've wanted to leave for a long time. At the time that I give my notice, there's literally no offer that will convince me to stay here, and I'm having trouble finding a polite way of conveying that. They already compensate me more than well enough, and I can not possibly think of anything they could 'give' me to make me happier here.

The problem lies directly with the way the company is run, and there hasn't been any progress on fixing core issues there in the entire time I've been working here.

Is there a professional / polite way of resigning from a position, not giving a reason and asking the company not to provide a counter offer?

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Note:

I'm not very concerned about the concept of 'burning bridges', beyond the concept that I'd rather not have negative things said of me if a future employer contacted this one to ask about me. I don't see myself ever returning to this employer - small company - or doing much future work with any of my current coworkers. On that note, I am on good terms with my current coworkers, there's just a large issue with the company that's making things difficult for all of the employees. Others have left, and I'm fairly certain I'll be next, in the coming weeks.

Answer 1

Can you decline to give a reason, and ask to not attempt to be retained when you resign?

Yes you can.

It seems to me that it's 'expected' that you give some sort of reason / feedback for leaving.

It is the norm, so of course it is expected. But there is no law saying that you have to conform to the norms. You can choose not to give any reason at all and choose to give no feedback at all. It would seem odd in the eyes of most of the people that ask you, but it's certainly your choice.

Is there a professional / polite way of resigning from a position, not giving a reason and asking the company not to provide a counter offer?

The sample note you provided is reasonably professional and polite enough. As I mentioned, it will still seem odd.

As you mentioned, they will probably still try to get you to stay, or at least to get a reason (it's only human nature). But you don't have to go along with their requests.

Just keep saying "Sorry, my mind is made up." Eventually, they will stop. Eventually you will be long gone.

Answer 2

"It's not like they'll simply email me a counter - they'll want to know why I'm leaving, whether there's something they could do to try and keep me here, etc. There's a lot of discussion that they'd want to have before doing a counter offer, and the point of my question is that I want to find a non-rude way of asking them not to waste their time on that."

Here's a resignation letter for your situation,

"Dear team,

I'm hereby resigning from the position of [position] at [Company]. My final full day will be Wednesday July 3rd.

My plans and location from Thursday July 4th are settled.

Thanks for the great experience at [Company]. Please let me know every way I can ease the transition and ease any paperwork.

Cheers, F. Attie

That's all there is to it.

DON'T say anything explicit, such as "do not send me a counter offer" or "no discussion will be entered in to".

The closest you can get to being blunt, is this language:

"My plans and location from Thursday July 4th are settled."

or perhaps

"My plans and location from Thursday July 4th are settled, thank you."

As my shrink says, "you can only be responsible for you".

If some person at the organization begins talking about the issue - that's not you, that's them.

It won't happen, but in that case just politely say "Ah. My new plans are completely settled from the 4th. Thanks."

Same by email, or spoken. The closest you can get to being direct is the phrase:

My plans and location from Thursday July 4th are settled.

Hope it helps!

Answer 3

I'd strongly advise against "I do not wish to give a specific reason for leaving. I do not wish to be retained, please do not submit a counter offer." This could entice HR to try to get to the bottom of the retention issue. Leave it out, if they try to retain you just keep saying "I'd rather not discuss, it's personal" which in this case is very true in that you are personally offended at their inaction.

Edit: If "personal reasons" would invite too much scrutiny, some other options are "I'm not excited to come to work here; I'm ready for a change; I want to try something that I'm more passionate about". Again based on what you've said, these would be true statements and they are very hard to argue against.

Answer 4

I disagree with the accepted answer.

It seems to me that it's 'expected' that you give some sort of reason / feedback for leaving.

No. In my opinion and experience, leaving is a very formalized process because that is the one thing your employer has no control over, at all. You hand in your notice with no reason whatsoever, as matter-of-fact as possible, and in the unlikely case that they try hard to hold on to you, you use the magic word: "no". Make sure that you get some kind of receipt to avoid the case that the letter gets lost on the way.

Obviously, you can inform them on multiple channels (e.g., a formal letter to HR, and a separate email to your boss "I handed in my resignation today, please let me know what you want me to do in my last X weeks"). It is the letter to HR that is the important one, and it is important that you get a formal response from HR.

The standard reason to give is "for private reasons", which is both the truth and pretty much unattackable. If they start to nag, then you can say things like "I have been offered a pretty exciting opportunity" (only if you actually have another job lined up!) or "I decided to change some things in my life" (if you have no other job lined up, so you do not have to lie about anything). As uncommitted as possible, not lieing, without giving anything away, and making clear that you do not wish to talk about it.

If your manager still keeps at it, like "is it related to topics X, Y and Z you asked about" then you can say something like "sure, if those had been resolved in time, it would have been harder for me to decide to leave", both truthfully acknowledging it, and making sure that it's too late now. If he then goes on like nothing had happened and tries to talk about X, Y and Z with you, quickly end the topic "I am not too worried about X, Y and Z for my last few weeks - how do you want me to hand off my work, and to whom"?

At no point should you (feel the need to) lie, nor should you talk more about why you are leaving. There is simply no reason to do so, the decision already has been made. If they are in the least professional, they know that and will know that it is futile.

Answer 5

Generally speaking, no, you do not have to provide a reason. You can simply give notice (in writing is usually required) that you are resigning from the company and your last day will be _____.

What might complicate this would be whether or not you are a contractor, or whether you are part of a union or other collective bargaining agreement. You would need to check your contract/agreements to see whether they cover early termination of the agreement, and what your responsibilities are if you decide to terminate early.

You can expect to be questioned because they want to find out how they can convince you to stay. If you are determined to leave the company, you can simply say, "I have decided it is time for me to move on."

Answer 6

I had a similar situation at my last job. I wasn't interested in any counter-offer they may have presented, so in my resignation letter, I simply stated:

Please consider this notice final and non-negotiable. 

Answer 7

Pragmatically, given that others have already left, management should be aware that they have problems and even if you don't say it, will either guess or attribute your departure to those problems.

To answer the question, you are under no obligation or legal duty to provide a reason, so you're left with the questions of professionalism and social niceties. Again, to be pragmatic, if the goal is to minimise discussion on the subject, the best approach is not to bring attention to the fact that you don't want to talk about it. You'd be better off giving a reason that is hard to question and that people accept than making stand-offish statements, or being vague enough to keep them off your back up to the point you have no further obligation to interact with them (i.e. you've left).

I'd either omit the last paragraph, or just use filler; there's plenty of advice elsewhere on what to say (and not to say) in a resignation letter, enough to distract from the fact that you haven't given a concrete reason.

Answer 8

If you are leaving to a better job, you have the power anyway, don't be a sore winner.

I would argue against anything that makes a bad impression. Why not answer the question of why you left with: "I received an offer I could not refuse" or something. It implies that they are not smart for not offering you more and does not necessarily relate to money, it might even have to do with your wife having made you move to be closer to her job. If really pressed, name a salary that would make you stay and if offered this salary don't say yes, but take your time to consider.

Answer 9

I would argue against both of the premises in your question.

1. You should give them the exact reasons why you leave. You should give a detailed account of the things that are not going well and the suggestions you made to fix them which were ignored. You should point out the disadvantages they continue to suffer because your suggestion were ignored. You should also point out that apart from being disadvantageous to the company from a purely economic perspective, this continuing refusal to change things for the better also spoils the fun which is an indispensable part of why you work at all: It is not only for the money. It is also likely that you are not the only frustrated employee.

2. I believe that almost everybody has their price. Money is fun, too; it can compensate for some suffering. Why don't you — seriously — ask yourself how much money would compensate for the (as I understand, fairly modest) suffering at the work place, and name that salary as a condition to stay, if indeed they make you a counter-offer. If it is a seven-figure, so be it. It should be enough money that your heart skips a beat if they accept it. If they ask you whether you are serious you say yes: that's the compensation I seek for enduring my work here. It is that simple.
   As a second thought, conditions from your side don't need to be restricted to money. You could demand more paid vacation days, more home office, flexible work hours, a larger office, a better computer with larger monitors, whatever would make the work more fun. You could also demand to report directly to higher management (the CEO in your small company) if the passive resistance you experience comes from somewhere in between.

The reason I make the first suggestion is that to leave without clarification seems lacking closure to me, a bit like walking away from a personal relationship without comment. I would feel better if I clarified things because an employment is also an inter-personal relationship. Besides, your input may be valuable to the company.

The reason for the second suggestion is that tipping the scale towards you may turn the employment into a mutually beneficial relationship: They seem to appreciate your work, but you feel not appreciated so far. A fantastic salary or unique privileges may change that sentiment.